Matt Carberry (kingpin248) wrote,
Matt Carberry

Advertising copy? Sure, why not?

Are you spending this Valentine's Day alone and hating it? Well, forget the bar scene, and screw that Q105 party. Come on down to the Navy Exchange package store and treat yourself. For just $24.99, you can walk out with one and three-quarter liters of Absolut's Sweden's finest! You get the alcohol content of over forty bottles of Boston Lager - and in a single, easy-to-handle container. In this tough economy, it's important to save any way you can - and that includes saving on your alcoholism. Stop by the commissary and pick up some orange juice, and you'll be set to punch yourself a one-way ticket to Liquorland on Saturday.

So come on down to the package store, and get ready to forget that you're snuggling with your pillow this weekend. We're open seven days a week...that's right, even Sunday. Nobody else in Connecticut can say that - 'cause it's against the law! Absolut, the package store, and unstoppable combination!

Boston Lager comparison based on its 4.9% abv value. Absolut = 80 proof = 40%. This is intended for humor only; the author encourages you to drink in moderation, even if he doesn't always do so.
Tags: alcohol, samuel adams

  • THANK YOU SENIORS!!! (clap clap clapclapclap)

    To the Cornell Athletics class of 2021, Congratulations on crossing the finish line! It's an accomplishment that you have earned every right to…

  • Hello LJ, my old friend

    A new day, a new month, a new year, a new decade — today, they all have come. Two score years ago today, I was chilling out inside a nice…

  • The 2019 Cow Harbor 10K, Part II: Race Day

    I did have a little bit of trouble sleeping on Friday night, and finally at 6:15 on Saturday morning, I decided it was time to rise and roll. I…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.